Calming the Heck Down

I'm just going to throw this up here so it's right in front of my face. And you guys can just keep throwing it back at me when I need it.

My boat was unexpectedly rocked today. I just got word of something that will affect my family and my work - maybe a little, maybe a lot. Generally, I don't handle change well. I don't handle the not knowing well. This time, I don't have a choice. I have to wait. I have to not know for now.

But I do. I do have a choice. Maybe not about what happens in this situation, but I do have a choice - the choice between freaking out and throwing myself into a panic OR doing what I would tell any of you to do - trust God. 

Okay. I won't lie. There was some of reaction #1. There may be, no, probably will be, moments of reaction #1 in the future. 

But I'm aiming for trust. Help me shoot straight, my peeps. Help me keep my eye on the prize and just keep making the next step, and the next, refusing to let my focus move off Jesus. I don't want to be guilty of expecting too little of God. I don't want to miss the path because I'm too busy trying to make things happen on my own.

'This is what the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel, says: “If you come back to me and trust me, you will be saved. If you will be calm and trust me, you will be strong.” But you don’t want to do that.' - Isaiah 30:15 (NCV)

In Isaiah 30, the Israelites' circumstances were freaking them out, and they were panicking in a major way. An enemy army was coming - a big, strong, viscious one. Instead of turning to God for help, they took things into their own hands. They decided to try to outrun the army on horseback. God gave Isaiah the prophet a word for His people, and it was the verse above, which contains a promise. In today's language, it would be something like this:

• If you could just get your eyes off yourselves for a minute and put your focus back where it belongs, on Me, you'll be just fine.
• If you calm the heck down and quit flapping all over the place, you'll have strength left to follow me well in the path I'll show you.

But the verse doesn't end well. The Israelites didn't want to do that. They chose the freak out, the flapping around, the figuring it out on their own. And they were destroyed.

Their circumstances didn't have to destroy them. My circumstances don't have to destroy me. They chose destruction of their own free will. They didn't have to choose destruction, but they did BECAUSE THAT'S HOW THEY WANTED IT.

But I don't. I don't want that. I want to choose well when things are uncertain, up in the air, changing.

I will put my eyes on Jesus. When my eyes stray off, I will bring them back and put them right back on Him.

I will calm the heck down and quit flapping all over the place. I will save my strength for following Him instead of spending it on trying to figure things out myself.

I will trust. I do not want to be one of whom He sadly says, "She knew the right way to handle life, but she didn't want to do that."

The Holy Spirit Difference

I've been studying Acts, and I'm hung up in Chapter 2 where it talks about Peter giving this amazing sermon and 3,000 people getting saved and baptized right then. Peter, who was less Billy Graham and more Mel Gibson. Peter, who fewer than two months ago denied the man he'd sworn to follow to death not once, but three times publicly. Peter, the one who's famous for blurting out whatever, whenever without ever thinking it through. Same guy - yet not the same at all.

The difference: The Holy Spirit. "These words of Peter's moved them [the crowd] deeply, and they said to him and the other apostles, "Brothers, what should we do?" Not Peter's words anymore, but the words God gave him through the power of the Holy Spirit. It has really struck me, the whole of Acts 2:36-47, so here come ‪#‎allthewords‬.

God, fill us today with your Holy Spirit. Remind us daily who Jesus is and what He is about. Help us to keep our focus fully on our beautiful Savior. When what we know from Your Word about Jesus and our mission conflicts with the world and sometimes even the church around us, help us be to so solidly entrenched in You that it does not cause us to waver. We want to be ready. We want to speak Your words through the power of the Holy Spirit to those around us so that they will hear and recognize the truth and know that it comes straight from You. Let them be moved deeply, that they would ask, "What should we do?"

Lord, we want to see a great revival. We want to see a stirring and an awakening, in ourselves and in the world and community around us. God let your kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. Help us not to forget the magnificent power You have. Start with us. Awaken us. Revive us. Shake Your church out of its comfort zone and into Your wild places. Oh God that we would see thousands come to You, repent and be baptized. Oh God that we would see Your church operate in the ways You intended. You are more than a pray-the-prayer. You are more than a security blanket. You are the fulfillment of our lives, not just in eternity to come, but right here, right now on earth.

God, the disciples followed you and that began something so completely new that it flew in the face of everything tradition and Judiasm and paganism had ever shown people. Instead of religion, You gave the disciples relationship - relationship with You, but it didn't stop there. Because they were unified with you, they now could live in unity with each other and truly to live the kingdom here. They were so unified that Jerusalem around them couldn't help but sit up and take notice and give favor to them. It was the calm before the storm, to be sure. The Gospel had to spread, so when persecution came they took that Holy Spirit thing and blew it up all over the known world. But first, they were such a clear telling of the Gospel just in the way they lived together that the community couldn't help but recognize how true and genuine it was.

God, break down the stereotypes people have about church and Christians by giving our communities examples of true Christianity. Use us. Rise us above the politics, the traditions, the little things that would trip us up so that we can, through the power of Your Spirit, live the Gospel in a way that our community sits up and takes notice. Not for our glory, but all for Yours. All of it Jesus. You are worthy. You are holy.

Bring it.

Christa

The Journey

I want to go on a journey with You this year Lord.

And yet, I don’t.

It scares me a little bit. It scares me a lot. It fills me with questions.

Where will we go? How will we get there? What will we do? What will it take? Will it hurt? Will I suffer? What will I lose? What will I gain? What will be revealed about me? Will the world accept it? Will I care? How will it affect my family? How will it affect my marriage? How will it affect me?

Me.

Me.

Me.

I’m so sick of me.

So let’s go, God.

You and me.

We.

Us.

You’re ready, and I’m willing. Help me lose the me, and let’s go on a journey together this year. Let’s see new places. Meet new people. Learn something. Let go of something. Trust more. Worry less. Release the me. Empower the us. 

You’re a big God, and You’re wild. It’s a little intimidating. It’s a lot exciting. But you say I can know You, and I believe it. I’ve seen a little of You. I’ve seen You come near. I’ve seen You come through. I’ve seen You show up. I’ve learned to recognize You in small things and in big things. And I want more. Until the day I die and beyond, I don’t ever want to stop knowing You more.

I am one woman, but I’m willing. I want to go on a journey with You this year Lord, even though it scares me a little bit. To be honest, every year has been a journey. It’s not like I’ve just now decided to hop on the bus. I’ve been riding it this whole time. My whole life.

But sometimes I thought I was driving. Sometimes I thought someone else was. Sometimes I sat in the back row, dragging my feet, looking behind me. Sometimes I sat in the middle, status quo – surrounded by people but stuck in myself. 

I let other people tell me where to sit. 

I pushed my way to the seat I thought I wanted.

But that one right there, that seat right next to You. I can see it now. It’s got my name on it. It’s right up front. It’s right next to You. Right next to the Driver.

So let’s go on a journey together this year God. And I’ll sit right next to You as You drive. I’ll try not to take the wheel – I don’t really like to drive anyway. I’ll keep my foot off the brake – You know what You’re doing. I’ll ride hand in hand with you, my head on Your shoulder. You’ll keep my eyes pointed forward, not behind. 

Sometimes we’ll take in the sights, enjoying the sunsets while meandering leisurely, spending time together. Sometimes You’ll say, “Trust Me” and You’ll drive through the canyons and over dangerous precipices. Maybe You’ll reach over and turn my face to my eyes are on only You. “Look at ME.” Maybe You’ll let me see so I can recognize what You’ve brought us through. 

We’ll stop and let people on and off. In and out. But the best parts will be when You pull the E-brake and we screech to a halt. You’ll swing the door handle to open the doors wide and out we will go, together. You’ll say, “That one!” and “Help him!” or “Love her!” And we will. 

Together.